I REMEMBER fondly a story one of our vets told me a long time ago.

She was minding her own business, checking her new, state of the art phone (it could make calls AND would you believe it, also send texts!) when it happened.

She was sitting in the driver seat of her vehicle, parked carefully and neatly in a delineated supermarket bay with the engine off.

Out of the blue and without warning, her car was struck by another, driven by an elderly lady. There was a horrible noise as metal met metal but no one was hurt and the geriatric villain was extremely polite and apologetic and assured our vet that she would pay for any damage.

Indeed, by the time she had explained that she was very upset and had never had an accident in over fifty years of driving, our compassionate professional was feeling really quite sorry for the poor lady.

The latter then checked out her own vehicle, which was scratched at one corner. ‘Not too bad this time!’ exclaimed the ‘first-time’ accident causer. ‘That will T-cut out no problem!’

She then proceeded to her boot whereupon she took out a well-used bottle of T-cut and a duster and set to work, skilfully repairing the damage with some gusto!

Suffice to say, our vet was incredulous (or at least I am sure that is the word she used.)

The incident got me thinking that we are all, at some point, guilty of blissfully stating the complete opposite to the truth, while really, really actually believing what we are saying.

‘Delusional’ is defined as ‘holding false beliefs or judgements about external reality that are held despite incontrovertible evidence to the contrary.’

There are so many examples in the veterinary world that it is difficult to know where to begin.

Some are obvious, such as the owner of the hugely obese Labrador that can barely waddle into the surgery, who states emphatically that she ‘hardly feeds her anything at all.’

Similarly, the proud keeper of the long haired Persian cat that requires to be sedated and clipped out for over an hour because his coat is so badly matted, who assures us that ‘she combs the wee chap religiously every single day’!

But clients do not have a monopoly on this type of behaviour.

There may be the veterinary receptionist who prides herself on customer care but doesn’t always smile when answering the phone.

Or the vet who thinks his bedside manner is exemplary but is occasionally to be found washing his hands and talking to the sink rather than addressing the anxious client behind him.

Or the nurse who discharges a surgical patient but doesn’t understand that not everyone can remember every instruction to the letter at the first time of telling.

As I said, there are so many examples, but the one thing they all have in common is that each requires an interested and concerned third party to take a deep breath and point out the delusional nature of the situation.

For everyone’s sake.