TUMOUR vigilant. That’s the correct expression. Tumour vigilant. Those of you who have a pet that has had surgery to remove mammary tumours, mast cell tumours or any other type of lump or bump that is excess to requirements will know exactly what I mean. Tumour vigilant. It’s partly a state of mind and partly practical. It can keep you awake at night or allow you to fall deeply asleep. It can have you painstakingly feeling every square centimetre of your dog’s skin or palpating each of the ten mammary glands on a daily basis. Tumour vigilant. It can drive you mad but it can also save a life.

Tumour denial. That’s the correct expression. Tumour denial. Some of you who have a pet that has had surgery to remove mammary tumours, mast cell tumours or any other type of lump or bump that is excess to requirements will know exactly what I mean. Tumour denial. It’s a state of mind that keeps you awake at night, gnaws relentlessly at your psyche and permanently and painfully occupies the back of your mind. It means you avoid contact with your pet, lest you find just what you weren’t looking for. Tumour denial. It can drive you mad and it can also cost a life.

Happily for Minnie the Boxer her owner is definitely tumour vigilant. Minnie, being of a breed (along with Labradors and Staffies) that is prone to developing mast cell tumours, deserves special attention. Mast cell tumours are nasty wee guys that seem to just suddenly appear and they can be very troublesome. Part of the problem is that they don’t look like anything very much. If I tell you that the text books describe them as soft, hard, in the skin, or under the skin, then you will understand exactly what I mean. In reality, they are difficult to diagnose with certainty without resorting to biopsies, so are always suspected with lumps that fluctuate in size, change in colour or consistency, or react badly to even the gentlest of touches. Minnie, unfortunately, developed one on her tummy, causing her owner to immediately seek advice, allowing it to be quickly and carefully surgically excised, as mast cell tumours can both spread and infiltrate. Minnie, being a Boxer, was neither up nor down and recovered without drama, but it left her lovely owner cautious and careful. Or tumour vigilant. That’s the correct expression.

So we were greatly concerned when Minnie was presented at the surgery with an apparently new mass on the outside of her hock that had grown very rapidly. So quickly, in fact, had it appeared that her owner was sure it could not possibly have been there the day before. She was, after all, tumour vigilant. Nevertheless, she berated herself for missing it and resolved to do better in the future. She needn’t have worried. Careful and expert veterinary examination revealed the ‘mast cell tumour’ to be a Coco Pop that had somehow, with the help of a splash of milk and a dollop of bad luck, adhered to Minnie’s leg. Hardly a cereal killer!